Dear Mom,
I thought I saw you today. I was making my way out of a store distracted by a whole slew of fleeting thoughts and in front of me, also walking out of the store, there you were. I lost my breath for a split second, trying to make sense of what I thought I saw with my eyes in spite of what I know in my heart. With every labored, yet familiar step I watched you take in front of me, my heart broke a little more, bombarded again by wave after wave of all the things I miss about you so much. You looked the same, all the way down to how your wispy brown hair danced in the light breeze…just like I remember. I mouthed “goodbye” to you as you got in your car and then getting into my own, helplessly sat there as God broke down wall after protective wall, bringing forth a river of tears I should have cried months ago.
Truth is…I can try to hide behind working to raise a family just like you raised me. I can immerse myself in the throes of every kind of ministry in the name of doing good. I can even insulate myself inside the faith that I will see you again one day, but those things only mask how much your little boy still grieves your leaving us. I love you and hope to see you around again soon. <3
Your Little Boy Always
